Will Marriage Counseling Help My Relationship?
5 Signs You Need a Marriage Consultant
Marriage counseling is frightening for many couples because of the false and negative implications surrounding the subject. Many people feel like their decision to seek marriage counseling reveals cracks in their relationship-however, you shouldn’t shy away from the idea of meeting with a marriage consultant.
Many relationships massively benefit from counseling services in unexpected ways. Marriage counseling is not indicative of a failed relationship but an admirable dedication to working things out with the person you love most. If you are debating whether to find a marriage consultant to help your relationship thrive, here are five signs indicating that in-person or online therapy with a marriage counselor will help.
1. You Struggle with Communication
Communication is the heart of every successful and healthy marriage. If you and your partner cannot resolve conflicts through open conversations, then it might be time to seek the advice of a marriage consultant.
Communicating with your spouse goes beyond simply sharing your opinion on minor matters. Communication problems manifest in numerous ways. For example, some partners might feel afraid of opening up and sharing themselves with the other person for fear of retaliation or disappointment.
When communication problems evolve, you and your partner are more likely to lie to each other and avoid addressing your concerns because your conflict always seems to cause terrible arguments. Frequent arguing is another sign that your communication is out of balance, especially when you repeatedly argue over the same topic.
Trust is essential to a lasting marriage, and you can only truly learn trust if you listen to and accept your partner without judgment. Additionally, many partners don’t communicate because they feel their partner always twists their words and misunderstands their intentions. One thing is sure: if you can’t communicate with your other half, you should contact a marriage consultant as soon as possible.
2. You’re Going Through Major Life Changes
Part of a successful marriage is the ability to grow with each other. Relationships get tested when a significant life change impacts one or both partners. Many couples find that marriage counseling improves their relationships when they struggle to navigate considerable shifts in their lives.
Major life changes cover a range of topics, such as:
- The birth of a child
- Relocating to a new area
- Going through a significant financial loss
- Major career changes
- Empty nesting
- Health problems
- Death in the family
- Retirement
Though these examples are not the only significant life changes that you might go through with your spouse, any change that causes tension in your marriage that hasn’t been there before warrants further counseling.
3. There’s a Lack of Physical Intimacy
Marriage counselors often help couples struggling with a newfound lack of intimacy. Your relationship once had a healthy, active sex life, but over time, you feel that sexual attraction and physical intimacy are practically nonexistent with your partner.
You may notice a lack of physical intimacy when you and your spouse take longer breaks between having sex than usual or if you don’t find as much pleasure in sex with your partner anymore. In some cases, married couples experience a change that causes them to stop having sex entirely.
A relationship without physical intimacy and attraction will struggle to last very long. If you and your spouse have begun noticing sharp declines in your sex life, you should seek marriage counseling. Marriage counseling works wonders for couples that want to rediscover intimacy and sexual attraction.
4. Your Partner Withholds Affection
Physical intimacy, while a massive part of a happy marriage, isn’t the only factor in your relationship. If your partner frequently withholds affection from you, this is a sign that something isn’t right. For instance, your partner may withhold affection as a punishment when they dislike something you do or say. In this case, your partner gives you the cold shoulder instead of kindness and understanding.
Your marriage will struggle if one or both of you withhold affection after arguments or minor disagreements. Mistakes are human, and you will inevitably make some during your marriage. Even if you and your partner are arguing, you must approach each other with love and understanding. Arguments should never make you or your spouse feel underappreciated and unloved.
If you notice that you frequently argue and that your arguments are unresolved and cause tension, you should seek marriage counseling. Even when you’re upset with your partner, either of you withholding affection will cause more damage to your relationship.
5. You Feel Like You’re Drifting Apart
Sometimes, it feels impossible to put a concrete label on why your relationship is struggling. While there might not be any infidelity, life changes, or extraneous events causing a rift in your relationship, a growing distance between you and your partner indicates deeper issues.
A marriage consultant can help you understand why you and your partner are drifting apart. When this happens in a marriage, you may feel disconnected from your spouse, like you cannot open up to them as you did in the past. Additionally, drifting apart might manifest in unconsciously withholding information from your partner that you would have shared previously. Even something as simple as realizing that you no longer want to talk about your day with your partner could indicate that you are drifting apart.
Being uninvolved in your partner’s life isn’t a marriage it’s a roommate situation. If you feel like you are alone even when you are with your partner, there are serious underlying issues that you should address with a professional marriage consultant.
Bottom Line
Marriage counseling will significantly benefit your relationship, especially if you are undergoing any issues discussed in this article. Finding the right marriage consultant is equally as vital as acknowledging the problem in the first place.
Counselors like Heidi Harris can help bring life back to your marriage with comprehensive and practical strategies to encourage genuine connection, affection, and intimacy. Heidi offers in-person or remote online therapy to ensure that you and your spouse can work through your issues and rediscover your love for one another. Contact Heidi today to learn more about her services and how you can transform your relationship.
